warning
not running related - more of a vent so please ignore.
So I have been feeling pretty good lately. Relative to lots of other times in my life I am going well. I ran 3 times last week (including the weekend). Have been doing a bootcamp twice a week for a month. And I am really enjoying it all. But I still have this habitually self defeating thing going on where I do things that stop me really going where I want to go. Firstly I have had 3 big nights and one late night since Friday. Which is fine - but not when it gets in the way of something that I really want to do (ie improve my running). For instance last night. I went with some friends to an anti-valentines party. Fine - but there was no need to share 4 bottles of champagne between 4 of us and then have a couple of beers. I'm ok today but not in condition to go for a 5am run when I didn't get to bed until 2.
And then there is the fact that I am just so slow i can't quite believe it. It is quite disheartening. I am really happy with how much I have improved (from nothing!) but all I can think of is that it might just not be possible for me to ever really be even good enough to run socially (which is the main goal I think). I have flashbacks to high school 1500m trials when I could barely make one lap of the 400m track and it is the same kind of fear of being really embarassed. Just reading about everyone elses running is incredibly inspirational and I know that I can only do what I can do - but still. I am just in an "everything is too hard" mood - which isn't like me at all.
Anyway I am heading to Melbourne for work tomorrow and we are staying at fancy hotel in St Kilda and there seems to be a good sized park (Albert Park?) to have a run around in so I guess I will just have to take it a day at a time.
ok rant over.
posted by Ellie80 @ 1:53 pm
9 Comments:
A bottle of plonk each ? How's the head today ? LOL.
Have fun in Mexico Ellie. :)
do you know that the scary thing is that that was a reasonable night? usually we have 4 bottles between 3 of us. justified on the basis that "it makes more sense (financially) to get a whole bottle"... yeah how bout just having one glass????
Lol, You sound so much like me it's not funny; Ok, me when I was your age although I too am known to consume more than is good for me on occasion; old age and a very sensible husband put the end to too much imbibing these days; although you will see in my blog references to the Evil Twin Sister, my drinking buddy from my single days... in fact tonight we are celebrating her engagement so who knows what will happen.
Now then, one of the secrets to being consistent is to have a goal to aim for. It would be a good idea to enter a fun run. How about the Mother's day classic in April. 4 or 8km options; you could do the 8km easily. Believe me there will be lots of people there who are slower than you and by then you won't be that slow.
The trouble with reading all these blogs is that a lot of the people here have been running for a long time and are very good at it. It's not good to compare yourself to them. My husband has been running for 30 years so I'm never going to be able to run with him.
I am never going to be fast and am constantly beating myself up about it but that's just the way it is and one day I'll accept it! The social aspect is great fun and even though I'm slow I still run with others and we have a good laugh. They just have to turn around and come back for me sometimes! I promise I'll take you for a run around Centennial in the next few weeks and you won't be too slow for me.
So keep on doing what you're doing. It takes a long time to change behaviours that you have been doing for a long time so don't beat yourself up too much. One day you'll say, just a glass please, I'm running tomorrow. I couldn't believe it myself when it happened but it will.. all in good time.
Stick with it. You can go for a gret run around the lake in Albert park in the morning. I think it's about 4.5km from memory.
Ellie, Lulu speaks wise words!
Don't be too hard on yourself. I think Valentine's day is enough to drive anyone to drink a bottle of champagne.
Try and get together with other runners if you can because it will help keep your motivation going and you'll end up having a lot of social contact with people who also have to get up to run at 5 o'clock the next morning. Then you can arrange your runs so that you have a day off after you've had a night with non-runners.
Anyway I think you're doing really well already. I feel sick at the thought of boot camp!
Thats right Ellie if you aim for something then giving something up or cutting back won't feel like a sacrifice at all.
Oooh, Ellie, I think you are going to fit in really well in the CR community :-)
Hey Ellie!! Lulu is right... wise woman that she is! Don't compare to others RULE no 1... there are always faster runner and you can get very demotivated that way. I find setting a goal and working towds it is the best way... and the mothers day run would be a great one. It is very social and a good cause- and yes there will be plenty slower than you :-)
Organise a run with Lulu... she is great fun and your right much more fun to run with someone!
Enjoy melbourne and do't give up!
A cliche about a journey of a thousand miles starting with a single footstep springs to mind. Patience grasshopper. Etcetera. Improvement in running is best not rushed. All you have to do is make the mental shift to "it's what I do now", and everything will gradually fall into place. It is just incredible how much your body changes and adapts to training. But you need to give it the time to do so. They say you can keep improving for seven years after you begin running.
Some good advice here already. I like what Steve said: 'running is just what I do now'. Then, it won't be a sacrifice to cut back on the big nights.
With consistent running - even just 3 days a week, you'll keep improving Ellie - both in endurance and speed.
The training you're doing now will show through in about 4 weeks' time.
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